Diary of a Programmer 50: My Second Head

very quickly in twenty twenty five I have grown a second head. it takes me a quarter of the time to do the tasks that I did last year. I can outsource thinking and processing and performance of rudimentary and menial activities and I don’t have to think too hard about complex things that don’t make sense to me. no, instead I just ask my other head and it gives me answers or simplifies complex ideas or clarifies something that was before incomprehensible. it’s like having a dog who can suddenly talk and listen, with whom I converse over dinner and it’s like my day is now filled with space that wasn’t there before in which I can write stupid poems about being a programmer with two heads like a verbose conjoined twin of whom everyone is afraid is going to die at an early age if we maintain this mutant level of production. but I have to tell you that instead of feeling like a freak when I walk down the street in the middle of a weekday with my second head in order to grab lunch at the market I am starting to see everyone else has grown another neck as well as an invisible head. you can really see it in the glossy eyes of their first head as they roll back allocating some certain amount of memory and processing power to this brand spanking new twin thinking machine that is so the latest trend but more than that the future.